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Share & Support: School of Change

Whenever I see my girls getting into little girl fights, the first thing I would do initially was to be in control and stop the fighting. End of story, right? WRONG. I realized how much I was not helping them by helping them stop the fight. I wondered how long I could keep doing that – after all, I cannot possibly be there with them 24/7, right? What happens when a similar situation happens in school – you know, same script, different cast kind of situation? How would my girls handle the situation on their own then?

I have long stopped taking charge of their petty fights because believe it or not, they now take charge of their own fights. Since Sharleez is older and better able to reason things out, she is always the one who helps to solve her sisters’ fights by default. For instance, if Mysha and Myreen both fight over the same toy, (this happens every single day!) Sharleez would solve the problem by finding an alternative toy for Mysha or Myreen, or persuading one of them to give in. Or even in situations where Mysha and Myreen do not want to watch the same TV show as Sharleez, Sharleez would do the following in order:

  • Give up her throne (the sofa seat)
  • Allow her sisters to watch their show
  • Watch the show elsewhere (either in her room or living room)

In the case of Mysha and Myreen, since they are only 2, I encourage them to practise the power of persuasion on one another. You want that toy, you jolly well persuade the other to give in to you, or YOU WAIT. No snatching, no beating, no fighting, because when either one of that happens, they know that Mummy or Daddy will confiscate the toy. And they are left with no toy to play with – that’s not exactly what they would like.  Every now and then, I would be hearing conversations like Asha, give me the doll okay? Okay? Okay?” or Ayeeeeen, I want the baby pyeaseee. Later I give you okay?” Ahh, powers of persuasion. 

Fact of the matter is, they are big enough to solve problems and handle nasty situations like you know, who-gets-that-ugly-toy fights, who-gets-to-watch-the-TV fights, and even who-gets-to-sit-on Mummy’s lap fights. Trust me, I would go crazy if I were to be the one constantly solving their problems all the time.

See, when someone is under attack and wants to make it stop immediately, control is everything – even if that control limits someone’s freedom and self-expression, true? Now we would not want to be that kind of parents, would we? We would not want to always be in control and restrain our children from expressing themselves and handle their own problems, yes?  We want children with initiatives, children who can make the changes themselves because they know they can!

So how exactly do we bring about this “I can!” mentality in our children?


Without us realizing it, our children themselves can be agents for social change if they are given the right opportunity and exposure to utilize their creativity and powers of persuasion. Our children do not have to be gifted to be able to bring about a social change. Their efforts do not have to remain within the boundaries of their schools only – they should interact and share ideas with students from other schools. With SoCH, they now can. What exactly is SoCH?

SoCh : Children’s Social Exposition is an extension of the Singapore chapter of Design for Change Contest, an international program reaching out to 50,000 schools in 25 countries.

SoCh, launched this year in Singapore, is an exhibition of various social projects done by Singapore school children and independent groups, aged 9-14 years old.

The event offers a platform for teams to witness, interact and share the ‘successes’ they have had in their area(s) of interest. It encourages an open environment for teachers, parents and members of the public to witness the children’s passion and to hear about their journey of change.

Read more about SoCH here.

So kids, parents, teachers and members of the public, make yourselves free on 20th of November 2010 from 10.30 am to 1.30 pm for SoCH’s exhibition exhibition of various social projects done by Singapore school children and independent groups, aged 9-14 years old.  Details are as follows:


DATE:     20th November 2010

TIME:     10:30 am to 1:30 pm

VENUE: Raffles Girls School. 20, Anderson Road, Singapore 259978

 Event is FREE but do register early! 🙂 To attend, please send email to with your name/school and number of people expected.

I support this. Do you?

Thank you good people of SoCh for approaching me to do a blog feature on this one. 🙂



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posted by admin in Activities,Events,Family,Parenting,Share & Support,Sharleez Nadya,The Nadyas and have Comments Off on Share & Support: School of Change

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