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Team Pink or Team Blue?

I should be blogging about my pregnancy, shouldn’t I?

Let me explain why I did not do so earlier.

For a start, the first few months were very challenging for me – both physically and emotionally. If you want the truth, I was not exactly excited about being pregnant again. I was not too keen about starting all over again with a newborn. I kept burying myself under the blanket. I could not smell almost everything which included my husband’s perfume, the bathroom, my mum’s cooking and in particular, the smell of garlic. So my bedroom door and toilet door had to be kept closed at all times. Anyone who broke the rule would have to face my naggings.

SUCH MISERY. 

But wait, there’s more.

Kept feeling nauseous. Kept vomiting. Kept getting headaches. No appetite for anything. Could only take in sweet drinks. I was just too weak for everything. I hated checking my handphone for incoming messages. I hated replying to messages. I did not want to socialize with anyone including my family members. I hate crowded places. I hated talking. I even hated myself. Birthday celebrations were done so in my absence because I said so. And oh, the excess saliva is such a chore – I have to keep spitting it out like every minute or so.

Work wise?

Rejected almost every event that I was invited to.

Kept postponing meetings and appointments.

Went missing from social media for quite a bit.

Fast forward to my 5th month now.

(Can you see my saliva bag? LOL)

mepreg

 

Things are starting to look better. Appetite is slowly coming back. (I can already drink my good ol’ plain water!) Vomitting has stopped. Nausea comes to visit once in a while.

The excess saliva is still ongoing, though. DANG IT. My mum asked me why I like to collect the saliva in my mouth. Haha. It’s not like I purposely collect it in my mouth, mother. My body just produces saliva in excess. It is beyond my control. Sometimes when I get too tired of spitting it out, I will just collect it inside my mouth till my mouth cannot contain anymore of the saliva. Then spit out. On days when I feel like I should not care at all about anything including something called hygiene, I will just gargle the saliva before spitting it out. What? Want to judge me? You can’t- I am pregnant. Hur hur. I So wherever I go, I will always bring a plastic bag for my saliva. Yeah, that’s a good enough reason for me to feel lousy all the time.

But whenever the bad feeling comes, the baby’s tiny hiccups, kicks or punches will always remind me that I have a mini me inside of me. That mini me depends on me entirely. That mini me is the one I bring along with me everywhere I go. That mini me is the one who accompanies me 24/7. So even on days or nights when I feel alone, the truth is – I am actually never alone.

The Nadyas have been really helpful- they take turns to give me tummy massages on a daily basis.

“Mummy, it’s Cocoa Butter time! Come, I massage you now.”

When my headache comes, either one of them or Tatek will give me a good head massage. I am never allowed to carry anything at all when we go grocery shopping – not even my own bag. I used to judge husbands who carry their wives’ handbags. But now my own husband is doing the same for me. LOL. Sharleez will always volunteer to carry the bags of groceries for me if the daddy is not around. I do pity her because the bags can be really heavy at times, and I will end up helping her. But she always insists that she can handle everything. If that is not sweet enough, then I don’t know what is. Meanwhile back at home, Mak is constantly checking to see if there is anything I am craving for or if there is anything she can cook for me.

So you see, everyone is trying their best to accommodate to me, just so that I feel slightly better, if not a lot better.

How could I even complain about feeling lousy in the first place?

(Errr because the lousiness can really get to me and is beyond my control? Duh!)

Something that I always look forward to will be a visit to the gynae because that is when I will get to see mini me jumping, bouncing or even waving at me every time the ultrasound is done. That few minutes is enough to make me all so teary. It does not even matter that everything is in black and white.

This coming Tuesday will be my detailed scan. I have been waiting forever for this day to come – to find out whether I am carrying a baby boy or girl.

Every expecting mother will always have the same copy and paste script –

“It does not matter whether it’s a boy or girl, just as long as the baby is healthy.”

It is true. Honestly, it can get pretty frustrating when people ever so confidently tell you what the gender of your baby SHOULD be. (Like I have any control over this?)

But what do you think?

pinkblue

JOIN THIS POLL, JUST FOR THE FUN OF IT! 

Wait for my reveal on Tuesday! Insya’allah.

Do pray that everything goes well for me? <3

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